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SIMPLE + TRUE

by Grace Theisen

Simple + True EP available now on iTunes and Spotify.

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I have always been someone who values deep, intentional conversation above almost everything else in life. If you know me... you know I am way more comfortable sitting in a corner one on one with a soul discussing pain and suffering versus having to be in a group setting. I don’t know why but getting to the heart of a person’s soul just makes me come alive like nothing else in this world. - But with this gift also comes a tendency to hold on too tightly to people, experiences and places. I get so emotionally invested and then when people leave or I leave or things don’t work out... I fall a part. I feel as if a piece of my heart is also leaving me as well. This last year knocked the wind out of my sails and before coming to Costa Rica, I was very bitter and guarded towards life and others because of how much pain this year brought. - But these last few days here have been full of unexpected surprises and time spent in long conversations and sharing of hearts. For the first time in a LONG time, I started to feel myself open back up. I didn’t shut down or back away from who I am at my core... I stayed open to the process and was received with open and gentle arms. And sometimes that’s all we need to know that we are actually going to be OK. That we are capable of love and of being loved. - My amazing roommate/partner in crime reminded me late last night that sometimes the Universe sends people our way for short periods to teach us things and remind us of who we are at our core. And we can take what we have learned and apply it to our lives and trust that their purpose was served. We can hold onto the beautiful moments and conversations shared while simultaneously letting them go. We can stay open and vulnerable to life without having to attach to everything and everyone around us. And I am so dang grateful for these last few (epic) days and to the people that were a part of teaching me this very thing. ❤️
THIS WEEK. THE PEOPLE. THE SURF. I am just so dang grateful for this experience and this job. It took me 4 weeks but I FINALLY made it out the back this week and surfed some green waves. It was by far the most EPIC and TERRIFYING thing I have ever done. I was just so dang proud of myself for doing the dang THING-fears, anxiety, pain and all. It was a massive hurdle for me on so many levels. To be totally honest I didn’t think my body would ever be able to get out there or get strong enough to do it. It has taken a LOT of hard mental work and working out to get back there and that paddle out is NO JOKE. 🤦🏻‍♀️ - This week I also had the toughest pain day I’ve had since being here and had to take some time to go sit by the ocean and breath. I couldn’t stop crying and had this massive wave of negative thoughts running through my head: “What if this is always my life.... What if have to take pain meds forever.. What if it just keeps getting worse.” But something about being in front of the ocean and realizing that I have conquered SO many fears-physically and mentally with surfing and being here-it hit me that pain HASNT EVER stopped me. I realized it had been months since I had a pain day that bad and those mental thoughts use to be my every DAY battle. I reminded myself of all the beautiful humans I have gotten to meet and the fact that I am surfing and doing yoga daily and actually LIVING LIFE again without pain being the center of my attention 24/7. I promise you there is HOPE even in the dark days. - The jungle has this way of pulling people out of their shells when coming here and this space is just so dang special. I know it’s already changed me in so many ways. I will never take for granted the fact that I get to sit next to others here as they process pain, grief, suffering and to get to cry with them... and then rejoice, laugh and celebrate them when they catch a wave or face fears. It’s just epic on so many levels. - A special shoutout to my roomie for catching this picture of me coming out of the water and just being one of the best humans I know. ❤️ @matthewbienz
“We are all born with the capacity to find the hidden light in all events and all people. We are here to heal the world one heart at a time. We are all healers of the world... and it starts with healing the world that touches you.” -Rachel Naomi - I won’t forget sitting on the beach this week with some of these amazing humans, sharing stories of heartbreak, pain, suffering and coming to the unilateral conclusion that it’s THESE very things that shape us into who we are. It’s the very parts of ourselves that need healing that in turn become the parts of ourselves that help to heal others. - If I have learned anything in walking through six years of chronic pain it’s that my story-my experience with suffering-is the very thing that bridges the gap between me and another soul. It’s not my accomplishments or achievements-it’s actually in talking about my weaknesses and experiences with pain that instantly connect me to someone else... because we ALL face suffering. We ALL walk through our own gates of hell. And while my pain may not be the same as someone else’s pain-we all experience it and it’s the ONE thing in life that levels the playing field between mankind. But it doesn’t stop there. We have to allow ourselves to stay open and become transformed by our pain and suffering-to allow it to soften and deepen our hearts-so that when others around us are walking through hell... we are able to sit beside them and share in their suffering with integrity and authenticity. We are able to help carry their load. - WE are the healers. WE are the light. WE are what is going to change the world into a kinder place... and it starts first with loving yourself and then the person in front of you. - PS: I have the best job in the world. I still can’t get over how many insanely amazing and gorgeous humans I get to meet inside and out. 😍
If you need me... I will forever be riding horses into the sunset on a beach in Costa Rica. - Week two of @shakacostarica down in the books. If the rest of my months here are like the first two weeks... I may never leave. ❤️
“People always ask me, ‘Why is it that you are so authentic? How is it so easy for others to connect with you?’ I think it starts because I like me. And I like my story-all the bumps and bruises the highs and the lows. I am not afraid of them and I sort of think that is what makes me uniquely me. I have always been open-with my staff, young people, my friends-there isn’t much people who know me don’t know about me because I am so use to sharing that part of me because I think even the tough spots are important for me to examine and explore. I never wanted young people to look at me-as Michelle Obama-and think ‘Well she never had it rough. She never had challenges. She never had fears.” -Michelle Obama, on Oprah’s Super Soulful Sunday
Let me just repeat... I LITERALLY FOUND HEAVEN ON EARTH TODAY. Yes it took 3 hours to trek to on horse, through rivers and bogs with zero consent forms... but that’s jungle living ya?!? - We had the kindest guide, Douglas, who BLESS HIS HEART literally got off his horse at one point, whipped out his machete and chopped down some passion fruit for us to try... led us tried and true to the MOST EPIC SUNSET I HAVE EVER SEEN on a private beach all while lightning and thunder followed us. The ride ended with pitch black night riding through bogs with me being the only one who had ever ridden a horse before. 😂Would this ride have ever been allowed in the U.S?! NOPE. And that’s why I am learning the jungle never shows and tells. ;) JUST FOUND MY NEXT DREAM JOB. MOST EPIC SUNSET OF MY LIFE. And YES he let me “gallop” on the beach. 🤗 - WILL NEVER GET OVER TODAY. And will be dreaming about this ride for a long time. STOKED I get to go back again for the next two months with more guests. Watch out Douglas... I’m coming for your job. - #cowboydouglas #wheresdouglas #justfollowthehat
Hello. I am your new @shakacostarica social host. I am prone to deep conversations, talking matters of the heart within five minutes of knowing you, dancing, singing and laughing at how bad my Spanish still is even after 12 years of taking it in school. 🙈 But that won’t stop me from trying to speak it! (Praise hands for Google translator and kind, patient locals.) - I WILL pour myself into this new role over the next few months and do my best to serve our guests to my fullest potential. PLUS I LOVE washing dishes and am OCD about cleaning so... it’s a win win for everyone right?! ;) I came into this SO nervous about travel, being away from comfort, my people... etc but so far this entire experience has exceeded my expectations ten fold. Mike (the owner) and Matt (my partner in crime/fellow social host) are INSANELY talented (and INSANELY hard working) at creating a space for people to come and let their walls down. Within 24 hours of staying here... I cried at how PEACEFUL this place is and how intentional and kind everyone is. Not to mention when Matt was reading to me prior guests reviews on Trip Advisor, I just started crying hearing what they wrote because everything about their words were SPOT ON and I have only been here for four days. This place is literal HOLY GROUND for true inner and outer healing, rest, relaxation, lots of laughter and a chance to make an entirely new family. - EHHHHHH. Not sure I will ever leave. I have been officially sucked into Shaka’s VORTEX of LOVE and don’t think I will ever come out. 🙈 But if/when I do... I know I will be a changed human... more compassionate, more light hearted and more whole. It’s apparently the secret ingredients in the water we are drinking. 🤗 - But REALLY GUYS. Everything about this place is literal heaven on earth. Worth every penny and all the travel. After day one of surfing with the guests today... I couldn’t stop smiling at how FAR I have come to get here and just feel so overwhelmed with gratitude to be a part of this place for a bit. - OVER AND OUT. And NO THIS IS NOT A SPONSORED POST. It’s just that good.
When you go to Hawaii on a whim with your BFF and then meet the coolest girl who tells who about how she just traveled the world for 5 months before starting a new job and about this place called Shaka (a surf and yoga retreat in Costa Rica) and that there’s a position opening up to be a social host and that you should apply for it... YOU FIRST THINK of all the reasons why you couldn’t/shouldn’t do that... but then you SURF for the first time and it’s like everything in you comes to LIFE in a way that hasn’t happened in a LONG time. So you apply for the job on a whim. - Hey guys?! I GOT THE JOB. And am on my way to Costa Rica RIGHT NOW to live there for the next few months. I will be working at Shaka and YES. THIS IS BY FAR THE CRAZIEST THING I HAVE EVER DONE. But sometimes when you are “stuck” in life, need a reason to get off pain meds, re-set mentally/emotionally and space to heal from this past year of craziness... you say YES to something crazy like this. - This trip is 100% about me facing fears, learning to live with pain again medication free and falling back in love with who I am at my core and with God. I also understand not everyone in life has the opportunity to stop what you are doing and travel across the world for a few months... and I want to be sensitive on my page that me posting about this isn’t about “oh look how cool I am.” In fact the opposite. I have no IDEA what/where I am supposed to do/be next and have some major decisions to make when I get back so for me-this trip is taking some much needed time and space to breath and just BE. If I have learned anything this year it’s that if YOU are not OK... nothing you do or touch will be either. And my focus right now is just to be OK again. - Living overseas been something I have always wanted to do and life has opened up some space and time for me to DO IT NOW. But maybe for you it’s not travel.. maybe it’s just REST. Or reading THAT BOOK. Or taking THAT CLASS. Do what you need to do to be OK again and don’t apologize for it. I promise it will be worth every penny, sacrifice and life will STILL be there when you get back. ❤️ Shaka.. lets DO THE DAMN THING.
On Monday I was driving home and had this pivotal moment where it felt like the clouds just INSTANTLY parted in my brain and I felt... JOY. The feeling was so intense, I just started sobbing and for the first time in a long time it wasn’t a sob of grief-but one of pure thankfulness. I finally felt parts of me start to return... parts that have gotten lost in translation over the years between surgeries, pain meds, pain, anxiety and depression. I felt this DEEP sense of “YOU ARE GOING TO BE OK.” - On Tuesday? I had the exact opposite day. Where anxiety and fear just kept coming and I couldn’t get a handle on my pain. After running errands with my mom, I sobbed the entire way home because I JUST WANTED A DAMN PERCOCET. I WANTED THE PAIN TO STOP. It was the most intense craving I have experienced yet in this detox process and it was terrifying. - Something my counselor and I have been working on is catching myself when I make “all or nothing” statements like, “I will ALWAYS be like this” or “This will NEVER not be hard.” Because I am a TWO on the enneagram and a MAJOR FEELER, my emotions can feel like the TRUTH all the time. On Monday my truth felt like, “I FEEL AMAZING! DETOX IS A PIECE OF CAKE” and Tuesday was “I HAVE FAILED BECAUSE I WANT A PAIN MED AND I’LL NEVER BE ABLE TO FACE CHRONIC PAIN OR GET OFF MEDS.” - BUT I finally caught myself in that “all or nothing” thinking and when I got home Tuesday evening, I took a bath and let myself cry out my frustration and sadness. And then I spoke up and told my family how badly I wanted a pain med. And you know what we did instead? Watched a movie together while I iced and heated my back and FaceTimed my nieces and family. - And guess what?! I didn’t want the pain med after that. Not because my pain got any better but because in speaking up and asking for help... I realized I am not in this alone. And I learned I can sit with my emotions and honor them without having to be ruled by them. I write all of this to say that the struggle is REAL. It’s hard, messy and I am choosing to share it with the hopes that others can relate and maybe, just maybe, we don’t have to feel so alone or isolated in the really hard seasons. ❤

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Finding beauty in pain, through creating art, in pursuit of redemption. 

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